"A JOURNEY TOWARDS ACCEPTANCE"
At the age of 15 Faried experienced some changes happening with his skin.
Some strange white spots started to appear out of the blue. Starting with light white patches becoming brighter, paler and bigger. At a centain point the white patches started to appear on his face, chest, back, arms and legs and before he knew his entire body was covered with this unknown condition.
The sudden appearance and expanding of these white patches was a major shock to Faried. He truly did not had any clue was happening to his skin and why this was happening to him. Just like he himself, his family and friends were also shocked seeing him suddenly covered with strange white patches.
He went to see different doctors and visited several hospitals, yet no doctor could tell him how these patches came to existance and how to treat them. The only thing they could tell him was that he was diagnosed with Vitiligo.
Feeling ashamed and disgusted of himself and his appearance Faried had a truly hard time going outside in public. He did not want to go to school anymore because he was afraid of being stared at or being bullied. Yet he was given no choice and he had to go to school whatsoever.
Luckily Faried wasn’t being treated any different by his friends at school than before the Vitiligo started to devolop and were also shocked about these sudden changes.
Walking outside with white patches on his face Faried noticed that he was being stared at a lot in public, little kids were shouting “MOM! Look at him, why does he have two colors?”.
Of course everyone nearby started to look and stare at him because they were wondering what the little kids were talking about.
Faried experienced situations like this almost everyday and often multiple times a day. He could not stand the pressure and was always walking with his head towards the ground avoiding eye contact with other people.
Faried was so ashamed of his appearance that he never wore any t-shirts, even during summer periods he coverd his entire body. Swimming was a no-go! He was afraid that people at the beach or at the swimming pool would stare and talk about him.
Everyone knew him as a social person able to talk with anyone, however this sudden change turned him into an anti-social person, isolated from the outside world. He hid himself in his room playing videogames.
At the age of 16 Faried was introduced to a documentary called “The Secret”, originated from the book written by Rhonda Byrne. His cousins introduced him this documentary, telling him that perhaps this could help him changing his mindset and dealing with his skincondition.
Watching the documentary Faried understood the spiritual teachings being mentioned in the documentary. He also understood immediately that this would take time and that it wouldn’t be a simple task to develop his mindset and finding a way to accept his Vitiligo.
Faried watched this documentary daily for a long period of time and “brainwashed” himself in order to stay dedicated and having to the will to accept himself with Vitiligo. He was extremely determinded to get out of his depressive way of thinking.
Faried did the best he could being more aware with sending out positve thoughts towards the universe and change his way of thinking using “The Law Of Attraction”, hower the task was not that easy and it took a lot of time setting up the right mindset.
For a period of time Faried also took various attempts to treat his Vitiligo. He recieved an ointment named Protopic and visited the hospital two times a week for UVB Light Therapy. At that time he was told that this treatment could raise the risks to skin cancer. Also by recieving this treatment Faried’s skin got often burned by the UVB lights and he also had to be extra carefull being exposed to the sun. He took these treatments for a few years and also tried a lot of different expensive products bought online. In time Faried had gotten positive results as his skin started to repigmentate. However a few years later his Vitiligo started to come back worse than before at an extremely fast rate.
Like a warrior beaten on the battlefield Faried gave up hope and stopped with his treatments.
At a certain point Faried was done with feeling sorry for himself and islolating himselft from others. He wanted to life a happy life once again! He decided that he had to face his fears and overcome those fears by himself, giving himself no other option then getting out of his isolated behaviour. Thus Faried decided to take that one certain job that would challenge him second to none. He took a job as a door-2-door salesman and as a street salesman. He had to knock at peoples door or stop people on the streets, “look them straight in the eyes, talk to them with great confidence, be social, smile with dazzling eyes and try to sell them something”. Faried was 18 years old at that time.
During this period of time Faried gave himself no other choise and threw himself into the deep. He had to become a social person once again, be able to talk with random people, develop himself and facing his fears.
Slowely in time he became a different person thanks to his job as a salesman and his dedicated will to regain himself. Faried always had a certain charisma flowing around him and during his development this charisma became stronger. He became a person who had the guts to look other people straight in the eyes once again.
Faried had developed himself into a new person and was very proud of his progress. During his time as a street salesman he decided to challenge himself on another level. He wanted to be able to speak and flirt with women in person.
Faried wasn’t able to talk with women or flirt with them in person before, he could only talk with them on the internet and on social media.
The next step for him was quite frightening and unformiliar for him so he took advantage of the moments he got during his working hours as a street salesman.
He started to select certain women as a “target” to talk to and try to have a random conversation with. First he was trying to “sell” them the product that he had to sell for his job and during the conversation he was trying to keep their attention with his eyes, smile and charisma. When he noticed that he had caught their attention in a certain way he started to slightly flirt with them. Sometimes the women went with the flow but mostly it didn’t work at all. However Faried kept trying and did not give up that easily.
At a certain point he decided to bring his guts it to another level. Whenever Faried met a woman with whom he felt a click with during his conversations he had to collect all of his guts in order to ask her on a date or ask her for her phone number. Often they were flatterd but wanted to stick with a friendly chat.
Faried saw this method as a therapy for his development without having any bad intentions. So he decided to keep it up and push himself more instead of giving up.
Over time Faried felt more confident talking with women and flirting with them. The pressure to ask a woman on a date or ask her for her phone number was still fairly high, however he kept pushing himself without giving up. As his confidence kept raising and feeling more comfortable talking with women Faried felt slightly more at ease whenever he tried to ask a woman on a date or ask her for her phone number. Over time Faried got dates or recieved phone numbers from women whom he liked. Step by step he was overcoming his fears thanks to his strong dedication and not giving up.
Faried was 19 years old at that time.
A New Challenge
The process was amazing but it wasn't complete. Faried was able to talk to women more however his guts was still limited. In this period Faried liked going out to nightclubs and have a good time. The only thing that kept him limited at the nightclub was that Faried could only enjoy himself when he had consumed alcohol to loosen up. Without alcohol Faried did not have any guts to talk or dance with any women at the nightclub, and so his third challenge began.
Faried was fed up having the need of alcohol to enjoy himself at the nightclubs, so he tried to enjoy himself and dance with women without having the need of alcohol. It was a very difficult challenge because he was still very shy and the Vitiligo did not make it any easier. The envoirement in the club was also very different compared to the envoirement during the day in public. On every spot at the club you could see hungry men “hunting” for women.
Because of his shyness Faried always used to analyse the club, the women and also the behaviour of people. He wanted to avoid trouble at all times.
With many attempts and many rejections Faried still did not give up.
He used to go to the club almost every weekend in order to develop himself more, pushing his guts and being able to approach women with confidence.
It took him quite some time to be able to develop his confidence more.
Eventually Faried was able to approach women and being able to flirt with them without having the need of any alcohol. This was also where he decided to leave alcohol out of his body from that day on.
Faried had reached the age of 21 at that time.
Of course going out to the club almost every weekend wasn’t the life Faried wanted, it was just his method to create his self-confidence.
Thanks to his self -thought methods Faried created more self-confidence however this didn’t mean that he fully accepted his Vilitigo. In matter of fact Faried still struggled a little bit with accepting his Vitiligo at some points. When the Vitiligo came back stronger and agressively, Faried felt that he just had to learn to accept it.
He decided to go back to self-education and watched the documentary “The Secret” once again. Because Faried was older now with a different mindset he did not only watched the documentary from a new perspective but he immersed himself more into spirituality, self-love and self-acceptance. He learned that if you learn to love yourself first, life will be much more beautiful.
Faried was 22 years old when he embraced his Vitiligo completely.
"How will someone else love you
if you can't love yourself ?"
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